January 11, 2005~~9:00 p.m.
Two Year Anniversary
As of today, I have been married for two years. It would be clich� to say �so much has happened� because, duh, a lot happens in two years. But still, so much has. If you recall, our wedding was somewhat �thrown� together (albeit very tastefully thrown together) in only five days. Omar was on his way to deployment in Iraq, and I was about ten weeks pregnant. Not exactly my ideal wedding situation, but we made the best of it. When I think now, about how I would have planned my life/wedding if I could have, I realize that I would probably only just now be a newlywed. I think we probably would have gotten engaged in another year, and then married this past fall in an autumn wedding like I had always envisioned. I could see us starting a family in another year or so. And yet, here we are with a baby who is a year and a half old already and us passing the two-year mark as married people. Looking back, I would strongly advise against doing it the way we have. You know, to anyone considering getting unexpectedly pregnant and then having to marry shortly before a war begins. Because, really, it has been very difficult. Most married people have a chance to meld households (assuming they haven�t lived together before the wedding), figure out each person�s role in the marriage and in sustaining their household, and just generally acclimating to being Mr. and Mrs. Then, a couple years into things, they might have a child. Everyone always says �oh, a child changes everything.� And it�s really true. But for a couple who has gotten into a �groove� of being married, this small �change� probably is more like a hiccup. Leave it to us to do it all wrong and the hardest way imaginable. It was obvious pretty much from the beginning that our time as newlyweds would be the exact opposite of the norm. Our �honeymoon� was a one-night stay in Sacramento before Omar had to head back to Camp Pendleton. Don�t get me wrong, the hotel was beautiful, but it wasn�t exactly Tahiti, like I had always imagined. Plus, I was still suffering from severe morning sickness, so I barely was able to much on a bagel the next morning before it was clear that we should just head home and lounge around our apartment (five minutes away) for free, instead of extending our time at the Sheraton. What followed were several months where I continued living alone while Omar fought a war, and then came home barely in time for Elizabeth to be born. And that�s when the fun began. Really, we started our married life after her birth. I do not recommend this. Especially if you are an independent woman who is used to living ALONE prior to having two new roommates. It was tough to get used to someone else�s �stuff� in addition to dealing with a new baby and my new role as �mother.� Also, Omar was in school, which was very demanding and stressful. Not to mention that I was used to working and bringing in a paycheck. The fact that I was no longer a wage-earner was surprisingly difficult for me to get accustomed to. I would say that it took a good year for us to really get used to living together and being married. And even still, I have my moments. I can�t stand that he leaves his dirty clothes in a pile on the bathroom floor when the hamper is merely a foot away. I hate that he seems to be completely unaware of how to put a dish in the dishwasher and further, how to start said dishwasher. It drives me nuts when he leaves food out on the counter instead of putting it back in the refrigerator. But I love how he plays with Elizabeth and helps her put her purse on her shoulder. It melts my heart when he picks out clothes to buy for her at the store. When I stop and think about it, I pretty much always get what I want and things usually end up going my way. We have our arguments, but in the end, and when it matters, I know he hears me. He is a gentle soul and I know that he will always take care of us. It happened about two years earlier than I had intended, but looking back, I suppose I still �do.�
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