2002-01-09~~3:36 p.m.
Two Thumbs Up....His Ass, That Is
Some days, I really REALLY can't stand Dad Butt/Pastel Man. And some days I just really can't stand him. Today was the former. Let me explain. I was given a large project on Monday (finally!) which was only large in the sense that it was time consuming, not so much "challenging." The task was to compose a progress report for our client, the waste management/recycling people. I would have several monthly reports on tasks we have been doing to go off of, and basically, all I had to do is make us look like we've been productive (which we have been). The first thing DBPM asks me is, "You can write pretty well, right?" Um, yeah. You hired me, remember? I went to law school for awhile, remember? You can't really be THAT big of an idiot and make it through legal writing. And if you'd like a writing sample to prove my abilities, I can print a copy of my online diary for your reading pleasure if you so choose. But anyway. I just sort of said, "Um, yeah..." "But, can you write WELL." "Yes. I think so, at least." Jesus. So today I come in all prepared to conquer my writing project and bugged that this boring report which DBPM admitted hardly gets read by anyone anyway would be the tool by which he will rate my writing skills. Mind you, I will be writing on things about which I know very little, logistically speaking. I only know bits and pieces of stuff I've been working tiny bits on. Other than that, the reasoning behind projects, other projects in the works, past projects, etc. I know nothing except what has been given to me to look off of. So I get started. It's all pretty easy. Boring as hell, but easy. I'm writing and writing and trying to make waste management sound positive and fun. Not to mention trying to make DBPM sound positive and fun. Two very TRYING feats. So I go to leave for lunch, approximately halfway through my project. And Dad Butt/Pastel Man says this to me (think: deer-in-the-headlights-as-usual look and less-than-stimulating-and-more-like-patronizing tone of voice): "How's that project report going?" "Fine. I'm over halfway done." "Are you putting a good spin on things? Making us sound good? Keeping it positive?" "Yeah, I think so. I mean, I'm doing my best you know. I've never done this before, so I'm looking off the stuff you sent me and basically pulling the information from there, but yeah, it's positive." "But you're rehashing it, right? You're not just taking it directly from the others, right? You're re-writing it, right?" At this point, I'm totally beginning to doubt myself, which is annoying me. But I didn't need to, because I am no plagarizer. But still, how many different ways can you say "designed, produced and distributed recycling paraphernalia"? Christ. He's so blah. Just BLAH. BLAHBLAHBLAH. It is annoying to feel like I have to "prove" myself all the time to him when HE'S the idiot. BLAH! Then, on my way out, I tried in vain to lighten the mood by telling him of how I had just answered the phone with the name of my former employer on accident, (but only to a guy who works here...he then hung up thinking he had the wrong number, and I answered the phone again, this time correctly, and he and I laughed about it. I hadn't even known I'd done it and it was FUNNY GODDAMMIT!) and DBPM just went "Good thing it wasn't a client." Screw you BlahMan. ~~~~~~ On a cheerier note, I learned that Britney was named one of the 10 worst dressers in the nation. That is nice. It is high time someone acknowledged her talent in that area. Maybe now she'll stop it with the boas and denim. Crikey! ~~~~~ I was job searching on Monster today, and came across a posting for a job at Ryder, the moving people. This is a $2 billion company who boasts that they are "leading the way in worldwide transportation management." Then, at the bottom of the posting it said in all caps: NO RELOCATION ASSISTANCE AVAILABLE. Seriously. ~~~~~~ Instead of emotionally eating at lunch after my bout with DBPM, I emotionally t.v. watched. That's right. Elimidate. Sigh. And I felt fine during the show, but after, I just felt so guilty. But anyway, today's show only caused me to come to this conclusion: women have no right to bitch about the men they date, because they HAVE A CHOICE. All men are not scum. It is YOUR fault if you date a cheezy fool. This girl today had her choice of FIVE men, instead of the usual four, and still, she ended up choosing the most irritating and schmoozy of them all. The one who sang to her fully THREE times during the course of the date. At one point, I subconsciously ended up with my face in my hands and barely being able to watch through my fingers. It was awful. In one of his songs he crooned, "toniiiight, I'll be straddlin' your abdomen..." no kidding. It was awful. And she obviously LOVED it. I was siding with all the other guys on the date who were all rolling their eyes. It was so cheezy. Black guys are notorious for delivering the cheezy come-ons. And on this show, it is unfortunately more than obvious. What was worse, she had her pick of three other really HOT guys who were intelligent and real. This guy was a total shmuck, if you ask me. Which she didn't. But she should've. ~~~~~ I have two new favorite things: Cleaning with bleach Drinking Sleepytime tea before bed. It is amazing. I love that stuff. Wonderful. Oh. Can I add one more new favorite thing? It's Jasmine Green Tea. GLORIOUS. And it doesn't taste like dirt.
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