2001-11-28~~3:10 p.m.
Bedazzled
My money has gone up in a ring of fire... So after I bragged about how much money I have to be spending on haircuts and other lavish things, I balanced my checkbook. Lucky me, I have $1.88 to my name. Of course, I get paid from both PRF and Gay Crew this weekend, but please. Then, right after I balanced the old checkbook (an activity I put off every month when my statement comes in the mail...preferring to spend in peaceful oblivion to the state of my finances, with desperate wishes of a positive balance and dreams of overdraft protection...) I opened my US Dept. of Education mail (yes, I know, I vowed not to, for fear of Anthrax, but the fear of bad credit took over) and my first loan payment statement of my life was lying in wait. It is due toward the beginning of December, so hopefully, I can manage to save up enough for rent, bills and loans in the next three weeks. This will be a fun activity that I am really looking forward to. Due to my utter lack of greenbacks, I have decided that nobody is getting store-bought Christmas gifts this year except my family and boyfriend. So you all are forewarned, and I don't blame you if you choose therefore, to exempt me from your own Christmas shopping lists. However, if my decision offends or saddens you, you may make a donation to the "Get Lauren out of Debt Because of Law School" fund and hopefully, you will have better luck next year with getting a thoughtful gift from me, depending, of course, on the size of your donation. On the bright side, I observed the largest mullet of my young life the other day. I was outside Hard Rock Cafe, waiting for Omar to pick me up from Gay Crew, and there it was: a bright, shining beacon in the frigid afternoon. It was a blondish-gray color...more golden and flowing toward the bottom of the ShoLo (the "Lo" part, if you will) and more gray up toward the "Sho" region...nicely feathered and sprayed. The "Lo" seemingly went for miles; almost to the woman's derierre, but the cascading tresses teased this mullet admirer by stopping just short of being THAT wondrous. The magnificent mullet might have been enough for the average person, but to my unbridled glee, the mother of this mullet also had on a spectacular outfit, most worth mentioning. It was a long (think: duster) acid-washed denim jacket complete with a slit in the back. Across the shoulders were the airbrushed words "San Francisco California" in white. Underneath (on the main panel of the jacket) was a glorious fuscia airbrushed tower of the Golden Gate Bridge in 3d which then faded out into the background into a replica of the SF skyline. You may think "What more could be added to this uproarious fashion statement?" but, dear ones, somehow, the designer managed to take this jacket to the next level. There, in the midst of all this airbrushed tribute to your favorite city and mine, were strategically placed rhinestones in many of the skyline "windows" each contributing to the vision of San Francisco at dusk. It could have been that MulletWoman bedazzled her denim duster herself, or, it could have been that it was just a lucky find in a store at Fisherman's Wharf one windy day in the mid-80's. But no matter what the reason for this picture, I was filled with merriment. Yes I was.
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